WHAT LIMITING BELIEFS HOLD ME BACK?

ARE YOU SABOTAGING YOUR DREAMS

Limiting beliefs are the thoughts and beliefs that hold us back from reaching our full potential. They are the negative beliefs you have about yourself (primarily), others, and the world around you. These beliefs are often deeply ingrained and very often invisible or unknown to us. Limiting beliefs are usually developed in childhood, but they can also be the result of our fears, or other conditioning that has occurred during our lifetime. They are extremely powerful, and can prevent us from achieving our goals and living a fulfilling life.

You can usually tell that a limiting belief is responsible for the results in your life when you don’t achieve what you set out to do, and you have no idea why!

For example, I have a very long history of procrastination and leaving things until the last minute. It’s something that has often frustrated me. “Why do I do this” I wonder as I’m finishing a report for work at 3am the morning it’s due? And I’ve done this for as long as I can remember! When I was studying for my final exams in high school (as a teenager), writing assignments or studying for exams in my Masters Degree (as a mature age student), completing reports for my former employer, or lodging my tax return. Always all last minute rush jobs! Why????? Because of my limiting beliefs!

SO, WHAT LIMITING BELIEFS CAN I HAVE

We all have limiting beliefs; absolutely everyone has them. Some people just know how to overcome them a little better than others and, the good news is, that we can all learn how to do that! But first, you have to recognize what they are. There are a number of theories about limiting beliefs and the identification of the belief changes with each theory.

The Enneagram

The Enneagram is a system of identifying personality types, including limiting beliefs. This system is thought to date back to very ancient times and it divides people into one of nine dominant personality types (or points) as a generalization, but also suggests that we can move into any of the different points based on our emotional state and/or a particular situation. I really like the Enneagram for its philosophy of not putting people into boxes!

One of the foundational ideas of the Enneagram model, is that limiting beliefs cannot be changed. They are part of who we are – part of our essential make-up – and they exist to meet a need and serve a purpose within our lives. The first time I heard that, I freaked out! If limiting beliefs can’t be changed, what chance to we have? But the philosophy of this model goes further and suggests that there is a basic function underlying each limiting belief and, if we can serve that function in another way, we can overcome the pattern of the belief. Very cool stuff!

As a very (very!) basic overview, the overarching limiting beliefs associated with each of the Enneagram points are as follows:

Point One – Limiting Belief => I need to be perfect.
Point Two – Limiting Belief => I’m not worthy.
Point Three – Limiting Belief => I’m not good enough.
Point Four – Limiting Belief => I don’t belong.
Point Five – Limiting Belief => I must control myself.
Point Six – Limiting Belief => I’m not safe.
Point Seven – Limiting Belief => I don’t have the capacity.
Point Eight – Limiting Belief => I’m powerless.
Point Nine – Limiting Belief => I’m not allowed to be capable.

AREN'T THERE ANY OTHER LIMITING BELIEFS?

So, if there’s only nine limiting beliefs, what about all the others we’ve heard about. “He couldn’t possibly like me”, “I’m no good at chess”, “There’s no way I could get that job”, “I’m not very good at public speaking”, etc, etc.

Well, they all fit somewhere into the nine mentioned above. And keep in mind, those above are just an overview – there’s more complexity to the Enneagram model than what I’ve highlighted here. If you want to start to identify some of your limiting beliefs, the best way to do that is to ask yourself what that belief means about you. For example:

I’m no good at public speaking. What does that belief say about me?
That I don’t like standing in front of a crowd. What does that say about me?
That I feel uncomfortable in front of people. What does that say about me?
That, when I stand in front of people, I feel like they’re judging me. What does that say about me?
That I’m scared I’ll forget what I want to say and make a fool of myself? What does that say about me?
That I don’t feel I’m prepared for this – I haven’t studied enough or it’s not “right” What does this say about me?
That I need to be perfect before I do any public speaking.

And, just like that, we’ve identified the limiting belief “I need to be perfect” before I do any public speaking, which is associated with point one on the Enneagram model! Try it now for yourself and see how you go.

WHAT DO I DO WHEN I UNCOVER MY LIMITING BELIEFS?

Like most personal growth work, the only way out is through. That’s true for limiting beliefs as well. Once they’ve been identified and they’re no longer operating underneath the surface without your conscious awareness, you can start to work on overcoming them. This is not always an easy process, but it definitely is possible. It absolutely can be done – it just takes time, conscious effort and will. The key skill in overcoming your limiting beliefs is definitely self-awareness. It’s through self-awareness that you can identify your patterns and start to make the necessary changes. Self-awareness will also allow you to notice when a limiting belief pops up that you weren’t expecting and, I promise you, that will definitely happen.

If you’d like connect and work with me on overcoming limiting beliefs, pop your details in the form below and we’ll arrange a time to chat!

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